I was talking with my son on Saturday about his wreck of a car. He had the passenger door torn apart trying to fix the lock. He finally got the lock to work but the inside panel wouldn’t snap back on. I joked that if he met someone who wanted to go out with him while he was driving that car, then she may be a keeper. 🙂
In the early 1990’s I had a young man named Dan for me. While were roofing my house he began to open up.
He was frustrated.
He said it was hard to establish a relationship not based just upon the physical. Dan was good-looking and had a great personality.
He said being too attractive was a curse.
I’d never heard that from anyone before, but the more I thought about it, the more sense it made to me.
I believe it is hard wired into the human heart to desire significant relationships with people who love and accept us for who we are.
At the same time, we have good reason to be guarded and skeptical when someone shows an interest in us.
Pretense: Mere show without reality; outward appearance. Something imagined or pretended. The act of pretending; a false appearance or action intended to deceive.
I hate pretense.
Kevin contacts me about building a house. We meet, he is all smiles, seemed like I was his long-lost buddy. He picks my brain about everything from who to recommend to which materials to use. Later he attempts to hire my employee behind my back to save himself a few buck on trimming. By the end of the job, I felt like I’d been played like a fish. He used me for what he needed and then moved on.
Bloggers write for a plethora of reasons.
I blog for three reasons.
First as a way to release this stuff that rumbles around in my head.
Secondly, as a way to meet and connect with people in a meaningful way.
Thirdly, I’m hoping that once in a while , my kids will read some of the stuff I’ve written and it will make a difference.
WordPress encourages me to comment on blogs to build traffic. I’ve been actively blogging on WordPress since 2007.
Now I love comments just as much as the next guy, but at some point I began to feel like I was playing Monopoly with pretend relationship money. It wasn’t real. It felt shallow and superficial so I backed off from commenting just to build “traffic” over at my blog. If I leave a comment now, it’s because you said something worth noting. 😉
I leave you with two quotes by Emerson:
“I do not wish to treat friendships daintily, but with roughest courage. When they are real, they are not glass threads or frost work, but the solidest thing we know.” Emerson
I am thankful for a handful of relationships that have taken root directly as a result of blogging the past 8 years. DM