What she said/ what I said

When I got to the job site on Wednesday,  Sherry and her husband were sitting on their back deck.

“You are a slave driver!” she said.  “I was up until midnight,  so I could have those boards you needed ready. “ (I am paneling her 4 seasons room with car-siding.)

“Waaaaaaaa.” 

Did I just say that, I thought to myself?  . 🙂

She laughed.

I laughed.

It was all good…

Been working off and on for this couple the past couple of months.  A lot of health issues going on.

A lot of heartache.

I’ve had great talks with both of them.

Deep stuff/ fun stuff.

Wife and I share a love for the Little House on the Prairie series, so we’ve even had conversations about that.

Took it to the next level that morning.

Don’t remember if Dale Carnegie mentioned teasing in his book on people skills.      😉

Felt like I was in slightly uncharted waters.

+++++++++++++++++++

There’s definitely a balancing act when it comes  to coming along side someone who is going through suffering.

My job is not to “fix” or take away their pain with some words of wisdom.

I see it more as willing to listen…really listen and be present if they trust me enough to open up about what is really going on inside…

Had a friend recently take a risk and share with a group of us, about some grief they are still dealing with 15 years after the fact.  First thing they said was, “Now I don’t want anyone to try and fix me….just listen.”

Well, someone in the group didn’t get the memo, and lapsed into the “fix it” mode…right there on the spot.

I was SO uncomfortable.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Have you ever experienced some heavy duty heartache and had someone(s) in your life do a great job of helping you regain your bearings?  How did they do it? What did they do?  What didn’t they do?….or, if you want to,  Have you ever experienced the  opposite?

++++++++++++++++++

I had a good week.  Great week actually.  Received (3) unexpected tips from 3 different customers….plus a huge lead on two potential  projects for next year.  One of my customers from last year, was  bragging about me to this potential client…she even repeated  to me some of what she said about me.

That was neat.

Met with them in person yesterday morning.  Had a great rollicking conversation.  At one point, the husband looked a little uptight, (His arms were crossed, and there was this look on his face).  🙂

I asked, “What are you thinking about right now?”

“I feel like curling up in the fetal position.” 🙂

I laughed,

He laughed.

I think this would be a fun project.  (it’s a mother/ daughter addition to their house plus a new garage).

I will keep you posted.

Well, time to get moving.   DM

 

 

 

7 thoughts on “What she said/ what I said

  1. The great people in my life don’t ‘Do’ anything, they just keep checking on me, inviting me out to get me out of my head a little, sharing an experience or two of theirs so I don’t feel alone in the specific type of pain or frustration I’m having.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Have to add, like you, like when you send a detailed message in response to a post , when you adeptly read that there is more to the post that I kept out. Thank you for that!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I can sometimes try to fix too much… I have learned that I “should” (not that I always do) ask, I have an opinion on that if you’d like to hear it. If I remember to ask, I only proceed if I get a definite yes.
    The project sounds nice. I enjoyed building. I long to help a friend with a building project. Somehow, I don’t long to finish mine. I think it is the camaraderie aspect. I don’t usually have anyone helping, unless you consider the kids playing and, more often than not, getting on each other’s nerves and mine.

    Liked by 1 person

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