Growing up with big ears

Yesterday son John and I worked together hanging drywall.  He said he liked the picture I’d put on Facebook  the night before….(my grandpa’s baby picture).

I said to John,  I just wish someone would have told me when I was growing up, big  ears ran in the family.   🙂

Growing up I hated my ears.  I was ashamed of them. Kids called me monkey.  I swore that I would have plastic surgery when I grew up.  Funny thing is, when I could finally gets my hands on the $3000  I needed for plastic surgery, I had to stop and think about it.  They no longer bothered me.  My ears are just a part of what makes me, me.  -)

I’ve been working on family history this winter as I’ve mentioned recently and one of my dad’s baby pictures caught my eye.

I posted this series of photos on Facebook for my peep earlier this week:

Grandpa

Dad

Me

Son John

John’s son

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Growing up, my self esteem sucked.  No other way to put it.  I had a terrible case of low self worth.  I didn’t realize just how bad it was until I became an adult.

I hated my ears, I hated my name.  I hated the fact that I was small for my age growing up, not good at sports like my little brother.  I was different than him. I had a musical bent.  A sensitive heart. And I was clueless when it came to girls.

Low self esteem casts a long shadow.

It affects all your relationships.

Low self worth is  a festering wound in the soul.

I no longer battle with the self esteem issues I had growing up.

Restoring self worth in others is one of my passions.

A part of me would love to start a support group for kids who think they have big ears.

Question for you…What would you tell that little boy who came to you and said, the kids in school are making fun of his big ears, calling him “monkey, monkey, monkey,”  and picking on him because he is so small?

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Have a great day and thanks for stopping by. DM

 

21 thoughts on “Growing up with big ears

  1. Oddly enough – I’m not seeing the ‘big ears’. Kids can be jerks – and will continue to be jerks so long as they’re getting a reaction. I used to tell my kids to just ‘walk away’. If that didn’t work – I would ‘step in’ on their behalf (no, the school office did not want to see me marching through their door). Growing up years can be pretty rocky for most kids and parents need to stay involved and instill a sense of self worth in their children – not the easiest thing to do.
    My grandson….fifteen years old, six feet four inches tall, size thirteen feet – been taller than his teachers for a few years now. An absolute putz at anything remotely sports related…..has taken a good lot of ‘ribbing’ over that at school. But he’s a math whiz (so kids have learned to come to him for help), a mean saxophone player (can also play guitar and piano). Turns out saxophone players are pretty popular 😁. I guess what I’m trying to say – kids grow into who they are at some point…..(as you’ve grown into your ‘ears’ 🙃) and it’s up to us to have their backs until they do.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Wife has said the same thing to me before (she can’t see the big ears) It’s a relative thing. There was a kid I sat next to in band with who definitely had ears that protruded way more than I..so there are degrees…plus hair cuts can either hide or accent those little flappers. these days, I wear my hair short and love them just the way they are. But back when kids were ganging up on me calling me “monkey” they were a curse..you are so right..we adults need to have our kids backs and make sure they are not wallowing in a sea of inferiority. Glad to hear your grandson is coming into his own. Being too tall, can/ doesn’t have to/ be hard. I have a first cousin (girl) who was mercilessly called “moose” because of her height. Got it from her dad. Big guy. Yep, glad those days are over…

      Liked by 2 people

  2. All of you were darling babies.
    As a child the kids called Ben Dumbo. He had big ears. When he was around 10 his parents asked him if he wanted something done (he said his ears stuck out more than the ears in your photos). So they did plastic surgery to pull them in. It helped, he said, but he still has big ears! 😆 But they don’t bother him. I notice them but so what.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I had childhood issues but eventuality got my mind straight about others.
    I knew I was OK and, aged eight, I worked out the problem lived in them, not me.

    After that I saw it as ‘If they didn’t want to know me it was their loss not mine’.
    Problem solved and I carried that wisdom forward through my whole life.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Geeky and awkward. Weird home haircuts. Protruding front teeth from thumb sucking as a little kid and too young for braces. Don’t we all go through something because of issues we have with ourselves. Self esteem issues are hard to deal with. It just takes one person sometimes to change your entire outlook. I will never forget mine. A boy named Emiliano in 6th grade. He was a tough kid. I never imagined that he was picked on himself. One day I saw and heard a different boy and a few simple words allowed me to start my journey to believing in myself.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yep, home haircuts for me too. Love the story of Emiliano Deb…..would love to hear more details. about what he said. Sounds like a touching blog post just waiting to be written 🙂 DM

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I was too busy worrying about to get out of gym so nobody would see my scrawny legs to notice anyone with big ears! 😏 I wonder if our insecurities help us grow as human beings and develop empathy for others. I’m not sure that the bully boys or stuck-up girls from school days left school well prepared for a meaningful life.

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Hmm… I used to tape my ears to my head. But I was a girl and grew my hair long. Didn’t cut it short until I was 40 or so and no longer cared. The puzzle is Why do kids think they have to be like everyone else, when clearly we are all different. Except your family photos. You all look alike! 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • I tried the long hair trick myself in high school. It worked to a certain extent. 40’s is about the time I found my stride and became more comfortable in my own skin as they say. Isn’t it great to no longer have to carry those insecurities around in our mind?

      Like

  7. I’m on the fence because I’m shocked at how vicious bullying gets now a days. It’s not just teasing someone with words, kids are getting physical. And on the other end, promoting surgical intervention is saying” well, change this little thing for lots a money and post surgical pain…”
    And yes, building self esteem and character – internal qualities – these are the drivers that help us grow to have confidence as we traverse life hills and valleys.

    I think each young person probably would need someone who knows them better than anyone else ( like a loving parent) to determine when words of support aren’t enough to carry them through the tough age when some kids are so rough on others.

    Liked by 1 person

    • No getting around it, growing up is hard. Had a nephew tell me a week ago (he’s 18) he wished he’d grown up 30 years ago..when things didn’t seem so stressful. I do think it is more stressful today than 30 yrs ago.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Every little boy pictured is precious and a child of God. That’s what I’d say.
    Mom told us to let it go “in one ear and out the other.” Sometimes that worked but mostly it didn’t. Truthfully sometimes a punch in the gut worked better. Yep, I did it. Punched a boy (an older cousin) right in the gut after some merciless teasing on the school bus ~ he punched back hard – the bus driver yelled at both of us – but he never called me those names again 🙂 And I think we all go through those gronky stages ~ knees and elbows, talking too loud, teeth too big, etc. I remember an Auntie telling me, as a very little girl, that she wouldn’t be able to stand for me to sit on her knee b/c my bum was just too bony. Later, my grandmother pulled me close, into the soft folds of her bosom and sugar-smelling apron, and whispered “she’s an idiot, you’re perfect and I love you.” Lifesaving.

    Cheers!
    MJ

    Liked by 1 person

      • for sure ~ that was not (obviously) my favorite Auntie. HA! I was still respectful but she has said things like that her whole life to us ~ yes she has some mental illness going on but she’s also just a miserable woman.

        I’m sorry you were teased 😦
        MJ

        Like

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