The Nines Have It

“I can’t read your writing…. What is this?” (said in a sarcastic tone)

 Me :  “A nine.”….

Hummm… I had no idea that is a nine…

Here is how you write a nine…”  

 

“How much per hour do you need?”

(I told him and he rolled his eyes….)

Excerpt of a job interview I went through  Wednesday morning.

_______________

 

“Rebuke a fool and he will hate you…rebuke a wise man and he will be wiser still.”

Proverbs

The jury is still out on whether or not I am a fool.  My nines look a lot different since Wednesday.  The first several  times I thought of Pat (he’s the guy I interviewed with)  a few  choice words begin to tumble out of my mouth.

A few days removed from that encounter, and my anger has been replaced with a quietness.  He did me a favor.

Compared to some of the mean spirited bosses and supervisors some of you have to put up with , that exchange ranks right down near the bottom…

I have been on both sides of the authority equation.  I work really hard to be respectful, even when I have to correct someone , so when I hear stories of supervisors abusing their position, my first reaction is to get angry.

Do you have any tips for someone who is working in a hostile setting and for various reasons, has to try and suck it up, rather than leave?

(If you have time,  would also be interested in any abusive situations you have had to endure..if you’ve written about it on your blog, feel free to leave a link) DM

 

 

 

 

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13 thoughts on “The Nines Have It

  1. You don’t want to work for that guy.

    I worked for a DECADE for someone who was a lying snake, stole my work, dressed it as his own, back-stabbed and climbed over others. He worked full time at APPEARING to be this great guy ~ snakes can only be snakes. Eventually the truth bubbled to the top and he was ousted. I wrote about it here https://emjayandthem.com/2015/08/14/how-a-believer-lost-250lbs-in-1day/

    He showed up at an industry event recently and stayed in my orbit, incessantly darting my way, trying to edge into the conversation. He got my back every time. That’s the funny thing now – I can see his desperation and feel pity at his sad self.

    How to survive it? Stay true to who you are, keep great notes and make sure you have an army of people who know and value you and your work. Let the rest sort itself out — it always does, but it can take years to do so.

    MJ

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you for that word of encouragement, and the link to your post. I do remember you writing about that guy… I am also glad you don’t have to deal with his stuff anymore.

      Like

  2. I once many years ago was called into the bosses office. He was angry about an error in one of the ledgers and started reprimanding me. I started to tell him it was a correct entry, but he wouldn’t stop to listen, just kept up the bullying. I waited until he was finished and then in the sternest and loudest voice I could conjure up I told him the entry was correct. He loudly said;
    “Are you stupid? Did you hear what I said?”
    I replied in my meanest voice.
    “Are you stupid? Do you know who hired me?”
    “Yes! I did.”
    “Would you hire someone stupid?”
    “NO!”
    “Well, look at this invoice and then you can apologize.”
    He did mumble and apology. As I returned to my desk everyone in our office was laughing and doing the silent clap thing. I was never called in his office again for any error. :o)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. First let me say sorry you had that lousy interview. I hope you didn’t take the job if it was offered. Unless you need it really badly. Dealing with a hostile working environment might be one of my specialities. Ahem. Since I love what I do and since Jesus became my number one priority and since I’ve been working in the same type of setting for 23 years, I have picked up a thing or two. I have learned to duck and cover. I don’t speak unless spoken to, for the most part. I try to size up the mood of the room before I start getting chatty. I love being chatty, but a lot of people don’t love it. I get insulted by someone nearly every single day. I try not to take it personally. People don’t know me. They don’t know what I’m capable of. I don’t necessarily think they’re trying to insult me, it just happens. I’m much better at giving the benefit of the doubt now that I know Jesus. I always remember I don’t work for men. I work for the Lord. And finally, I was confronted by a bully not too long ago. Big brute of a man who towered threateningly over me. I became a peacemaker by asking if we could just hit the reset button. We had never had a problem working together before. He backed down and I managed to never work with him again. The Lord knows and he is a just God. I have no doubt that man will reap what he sows. The end.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You’ve caused me to think carefully about this and I can honestly say I’ve never had an abusive boss–nor have I ever been one. That’s one more thing I can be thankful for I reckon. My wife, on the other hand, worked in a terribly abusive situation for a while. Her boss was not only an arrogant bigoted hyper-critical jerk, but he also subjected his employees to sexual innuendos and offensive remarks. So she quit on day one, right? No, she didn’t. She couldn’t afford to lose her job even temporarily, so she stayed on, just as many people in that situation do every day. That’s the bad news. The good news is that the job was so intolerable that she left as soon as she could find another job. That new job she found was at the firm where I had just started working. So if that boss of hers hadn’t been such a pig, we’d have probably never met. Our family wouldn’t exist. So if there is a moral in all that it might be that there is always the possibility that something good will emerge out of the bad situation. May that be the case with you too (even if it isn’t as dramatic as what happened to us 🙂 ).

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I would have terminated that interview: “I’m sorry, I can see right off that I would not be a good fit for this company. Thank you for your time” (exit)
    I’ve worked in some miserable places, for some incredibly ignorant/abusive bosses. At some point I made a decision that under no circumstances do I deserve anything less than to be treated with respect and consideration (the same way I treat others regardless as to my personal opinion of them). I came to the job I have now (where I’ve been for 12 years) from an eighteen month stint working for the worst boss I’d ever had the misfortune to meet. Because I was questioning my own judgement when I was offered the new position (didn’t want to jump from the frying pan into the fire) I had my husband swing by the place around closing with a 6 pack of beer to shoot the breeze with the owner. He came home with a “yep – you can work for that guy – he’s good” type comment. Should I ever move on, I would use that technique again – or make a point of talking to others that are employed there.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I read your comment just now and thought..next time. that is exactly what I am going to do. 🙂 You do realize don’t you, you have just become a life coach (of sorts) Thanks for your input! DM

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Interestingly I’ve only got one response to people like that. I leave.
    I’ve also walked out of quite a few jobs because of a supervisors attitude.
    No argument, no anger, just tools packed and out the door usually uttering two words on the way out the second one being ‘off’.
    Know what?
    When going for another job and being asked why I left, the honest answer of “My last boss was a jerk” always went down well.

    Liked by 1 person

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