As I pulled into the parking lot of Starbucks Tuesday afternoon to pick up my favorite coffee bean, I realized I looked (and probably smelled) a little bit like a homeless man. We’d insulated all morning, trying to beat the heat.
Being in an attic 3 feet high, the sun beating down on the black shingles, absolutely no air movement, will make you sweat…..profusely.
Kind of reminded me of mowing hay bales in the summer growing up on the farm….anyway, so as I pulled into Starbucks, my first thought was, today would probably be a good day to just go through the drive through. 🙂
Well, the drive through was full and I didn’t have fifteen minutes.
I thought to myself, what the heck, nobody knows me, the lunch crowd has probably thinned out, and I can be in and out in two minutes….so I sucked it up and went inside.
The second I walked through the door, the negative thoughts began to well up. There were still several people inside, not that I thought everyone was looking at me, but still…. I knew I was a sight to behold if anyone was paying attention.
I guess it was a mixture of shame and embarrassment.
This sort of thing never happens to me as an adult. One of the last times it happened was at a wedding reception for one of my wife’s cousins at Notre Dame….years ago. Ivy league crowd and there I was Mr farm boy. All of the males were in jackets and ties,..several were wearing tuxedo’s and I had chosen to wear blue jeans and I nice top. My wife had warned me.. 😉 and I didn’t listen.
Don’t think I didn’t feel like a complete country hick.
Well, I got to the counter, and the young lady who waited on me, was totally relaxed. Not a hint of judgmental-ism, what so ever. I imagined what I must have looked like through her eyes…crusty old man, in an old t-shirt…dirty hat…probably not homeless if he was buying coffee beans, but pretty darn close. Coming to get his one pleasure in life….french roast beans.
She actually radiated kindness..and I felt it.
After I left I sort of wished I had gotten her name, so I could write a quick note to that store and tell them I appreciated her attitude. I do that sometimes.
This is not one of those major life experiences that would make national headlines…I know that. Hesitate even talking about it, because it is such a simple quiet, personal thing…but here I am still thinking about it a month later, and telling you about it, so there is something powerful in the very act of being kind.
Our world at large is starving for kindness.
I am currently on a “media fast” ie. I am not staying up to speed on current events. Like I told someone last night, I do care intensely about what’s happening in the world at large, but when I don’t have an outlet for the angst, it leaves me in a state of constant agitation. If I catch wind of something in the news that I think I need to know more about, I will do a little more reading.
For me, it’s been a good fit. DM
“Do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly….”