Got a note from a friend this morning:
“Thanks for visiting this past week. I value your input and appreciate your listening ear. I was encouraged by our conversation….even though my circumstances haven’t really changed….it was so nice to be heard!”
Told Mrs. DM about the note. Said it reminded me of a time in my life when a friend of mine..(Thomas), did the same for me – ( validated and listened to me.)
At the time it felt like I was free-falling into a black bottomless pit.
Thomas and I started getting together once a week to talk about what was going on in my life @ the time that was causing the angst. Just having another person really grasped what was going on in my life, to the point where he started to also get angry, in some mysterious way, gave me hope.
Initially, it felt like his validation just caused the free-falling feelings to stop… I was still stuck….but then pretty quickly, a glimmer of hope returned, and I began climbing out of the pit.
The circumstances didn’t changed at all…and even to this day, (20 years later) if I allow myself to go there, I can start getting angry. I’ve written about this before, so won’t revisit the details ..
I also experienced grief. and same goes with that..My grief would occasionally be triggered by the most random things even 15 years later…a picture, a conversation, etc.
So when my friend e-mailed me this morning telling me she felt heard and validated..that was encouraging. because here I sit, 20 years removed from having those same kind of conversations in my life, and still thankful for the gift of a listening ear.
Climbing out of the pit of despair
Never underestimate the power of a listening ear.
Have you ever experienced the pit of despair?
What got you out of it?
Are you still in it?