When Sexual Harassment Came Knocking

    ” A truck driver sexually harassed me this morning on my way here from Walmart,”  my eldest daughter  told me when I got home from work.  

     She continued: “As I was merging, he waved and I waved back thinking it might be someone I knew.    Then I realized I didn’t .    Addy was in the back seat sound asleep in her  car seat.  A couple of minutes later when I tried to pass him, he sped up- and I couldn’t get around.  I looked at my speedometer – I was going over 80 mph so I said, what the heck and got back in the right lane….then  he started to slow down.    This cat and mouse game went on for 15 minutes until I got to  our exit.  It really shook me up.  I didn’t get his license plate number but I do remember the name on his mudflaps….”

___________________________

I (DM) am a dad to 3 beautiful daughters.

They have all grown up  and moved out,  the oldest is home this week visiting with our granddaughter.   Today for the 7th time in my life I got wind that someone had sexually harassed one of them. I got onto the internet, typed in the name of the company, found their website and e-mailed them this note:

To Whom it may concern, Today is July 19. I just got home for lunch to the news that my 27 yr old daughter was “propositioned” by one of your fuel truck drivers as he was driving North on Hwy *** between A.  and B . she said that as she was passing him (it is a divided highway) he honked at her and continued to indicate something was up. She thought maybe there was something wrong w/ her car and he was signing her to pull over….This went on for several minutes. She slowed down but eventually decided just to pass him. As she did, he made a gesture which she took to mean he wanted sex. she had out of state plates so it probably looked like she was traveling across country. I’m not sure how easy it would be to identify who the driver was, but she said it was a semi fuel truck w/**** mudflaps.

As her dad I would like to meet with that trucker in person.. My daughter also was carrying my grandchild in the car with her.  Any thing you can do to address this situation would be appreciated. DM

I got a phone call the next morning from a company rep,

First, he said, “We take this sort of thing very seriously and will deal with it accordingly.” He apologized for the incident, even if it turns out not to be someone from their company, but just the fact that it reflects badly on the trucking industry as a whole. He also said that he himself has two daughters (22 and 19) and completely understood where I was coming from.

In the end, we were not able to positively identify the trucker my daughter encountered. It’s a good thing for both of us because I probably would have done something that would have gotten  me in trouble with the law.

Have you personally or someone you love been sexually harassed?

If you’re comfortable talking about it, how did  that make you feel and what did you do about it?

Any tips for the person who happens to stumble across this blog post later who is dealing with sexual harassment?

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13 thoughts on “When Sexual Harassment Came Knocking

  1. So if they would have found the driver, and been willing to identify him to you, might we also be reading a story about some interesting jail experiences 😉
    While I have to assume that you wouldn’t have done anything too unlawful, I think it has to be easy as a parent to have some moments where we at least contemplate a confrontation with an ass such as that driver. I’m also impressed with the company being proactive but still have to wonder if this guy does this often.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yep, It would have made for an “interesting” meeting. When I heard back from the dispatcher, he also sent me a copy of some e-mail correspondence between him and several other trucking entities, attempting to figure out who would have been in our area about that time. that in itself encouraged me, they really did take it seriously.

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  2. I have had sexual harassment happen a LOT. For some reason men (and some women) feel they can take liberties with a female physician. Intimate topics? Close proximity? Closed room? Dunno. I typically brush them off and make a joke out of it. Laughing diffuses the situation. On the road, though, is a lot scarier because I don’t feel like I am in a position of power. I have had episodes like what occurred with your daughter. The only advice I have in that situation is to not make eye contact and exit as fast as you can, driving to a police station if you have to. Also, I carry a gun in the car, but that might not be something everyone is comfortable with….

    Liked by 1 person

    • I would totally be packing if I were a woman having to drive places where that sort of stuff can happen. My respect and admiration for you just went up another notch 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Right now my 26 year old daughter is working in a predominantly male company as an assistant office manager. She’s shared with me how she’s been “shooting down” the innuendos and making all aware that she won’t take their crap. It’s not one person. It’s random people.
    But, after a heartbreaking split from someone she thought was “The one”, everyone knows she’s single and it’s getting worse.
    I’m giving her two months to find a new and better job. Or I’m making routine visits to remind them shes’ someone’s daughter.
    * Her company is right next to my parent hospital.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I loved how you handled this situation, DM. The letter to the company was perfect. Yes I’ve had to remind more than one man that the word harass is one word not 2 and to back offa mine! Sometimes humor works but there are other times when I’ve had to be equally aggressive to get my point across and then get called a nasty name. Whatever. The worst ones are the men who, after being rejected, become punitive. I have also been propositioned by a woman. That was just weird and took me a while to even figure out what was up!!! Great post, MJ

    Liked by 1 person

    • I agree, I also will use a sense of humor many times to defuse a potentially awkward situation, but, sometimes when you are dealing with a fool,different people skills come into play. looks like you had a full great week in Washington DC by the posts on FB this week. I enjoy keeping up with you that way as well. Bet your hubby was glad to have you back home 🙂 DM

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